Kids who remember parental errors would have to either accept these failures with some understanding or have to avoid talking about their issues with their mothers. These social problems have not been easy to solve.
It is not easy for both mothers and children.
My elderly aunt once told me she took her children on a tour one day after saving up enough for about ten years, and said to them,"this is all for what I had not done for you as a mother..." Her children felt bad as she had spent a bit on the overseas tour and they learned their lesson not to be critical.
One child who was lagging behind in school, upon returning from the family trip did a sudden turn in school and within two years, she excelled in her exams. She became a teacher after gaining a scholarship. Her brother worked for a timber company and saw success in life. They never mentioned their father who "worked somewhere in Indonesia".
This aunt of mine was an "almost single parent", husband was an absentee father,and she worked two jobs to keep the family going. But praise God she "did everything a good mother should do".
In the 60's it was common for many Foochow men to work in Indonesia and remitted some of t heir monthly income to their family. they had to send money not only to their wives and children but their elderly parents.
Some husbands came home when they earned enough, some disappeared and remained in Indonesia or elsewhere. These family breakups and related anguish were common stories of those days.
Wives who were left behind had to look for help as counselling was not available. The Churches helped a bit but mostly they had to solve their own problems.
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