War Time. Life of a Baby

My cousin, Siong, now 88 , lives in Miri with her family of grown children and grand children. She and her husband were match made by a talkative match maker who was very convincing. And due to financial problems her adoptive parents were facing, she decided to be married off even though she was less than 18 years old. She had said that it was to repay her kind mother by marrying herself off. Her young husband gave a good bride money (Ping Ging) to her adopted mother. 

She has a remarkable birth story and childhood. It was also how she became a Tiong with all due respect to her birth mother. 

 Siong was only given a photo of her biological mother when her older sister was sick with cancer, both of them were already in their 40's when they found each other.

She was born into a Sibu family in the kampong where her biological father had some social standing. Her mother, together with her mother's sister, according to my cousin's adopted mother were both secondary wives of the towkay. Her mother had three daughters, whereas the aunt had two boys.

When the Japanese came, every one fled into the jungle, probably Sg. Antu, or beyond Kampong Nangka in Sibu. Her biological father was no where to be seen as he only visited when necessary like to give some money according to Siong's older sister.

Siong being the youngest had no memory of her biological parents as she only remembers what her adoptive mother and later her older biological sister told her.

When the bombs were dropped in Sibu, Siong was only a few months old and she was left or abandoned in the kampong house. Three or four days later, when there was no more signs of any air raids, her mother and aunt came back. the miracle was that Siong did not starve to death after having been left in the house for four days!! How she managed to recover was truly a mystery and a miracle.

Her biological father came, several days later,when her mother was already prepared to run away. But her husband asked them to move to Sg. Assan for shelter. Siong's mother decided to give  Siong away because she could not manage.

According to her biological older sister, their mother was a dainty and frail lady, fresh off the boat from China. Both sisters had come together, hoping to work in shops as assistants. Both were very pretty and dressed well as they were skilled in tailoring.

They had wanted to work in Singapore but a merchant had introduced them to some towkays in Sibu. Unfortunately they did not meet good people, so they were forced to become secondary wives or concubines in exchange for life long work and food in the towkay's family.

But luck was still not on their side because the Japanese occupied Sibu soon after and they had to go into hiding.

After the two sisters moved to Sg Assan, Siong was given to a Tiong couple who were childless. The adoptive parents moved to Binatang or Bintangor even before the war was over. They gave her their surname and a name. Siong never knew her birth name. It was only 40 years later that she learned of her father's name But of his family the three sisters, newly acquainted, did not find any trace.

For many years Siong did not know that she was adopted as she was sent to school to be educated by the Catholic Church and she was well brought up. In 1952 she studied in St. Augustine school which was teaching in two mediums, both Chinese and English. She remembers her school was called the Catholic Ing Hang (Anglo Chinese) school. She was already about 10 years old then. In fact she was so good she was allowed to accelerate to Primary 3 after her first year. She again was promoted to Year 6. But then she was already 14 years old. She went to Junior middle for a year and then her parents had financial problems so she had to work in a coffee shop and take in sewing together with her mother.

Photo : Lim Chin Yong.

She never felt that she was unwanted. She was very pretty and lovable as a child. Her parents also adopted a young boy when she was about 10 years old. 

Today she continues to be a very strong Catholic, a very forgiving person, kind to every one. She knew that her biological sisters died more than 20 years ago. Interestingly, Siong said that her biological mother, though, never a Muslim, lived with her two daughters who embraced Islam, for a few years and died sometime in the early 1950's. 

Siong said that it was probably because her mother was so poverty stricken and of very bad health after the war that she and her two daughters had to live with a Muslim family in the kampong either in Sibu or in Sg. Assan. Life must have been very very difficult.

Siong when recounting her life story also remarked that she and her biological sisters never knew what happened to their mother's sister and her two sons.